Brain Gravy

Mmm... is for “Mustard”!

2010-04-10T22:07:00.006-04:00

Someone needs to locate some of this and mail it to me:

Wostyntje Mustard Ale [7% ABV]
('t Smisje Wostyntje Torhouts Mostaard Bier)
from Regenboog Brewery (Brouwerij de Regenboog)
in Assebroek-Brugge, Belgium:

DM me for address inquiries.
I like mustard.

	Thanks,
	--- JJJENNNNN

2010-02-12T08:55:00.002-05:00

Hello everyone, I am back, about 10 pounds lighter and feeling optimistic. Here is what I’ve done. First I have cut out as much sugar from my diet as I can, success. I have now started eating a ton of raw fruits and vegetables. Then finally I have started doing yoga. I have to say other than my hangover from last night, I feel great.
This is what I’ve learned. Beer is delicious and some of the other things I have been eating are just okay. So I am compromising. More stuff I love and less stuff I don’t. Instead of frying food I have been baking. Taking my lunch to work has helped a ton. I found snacking on nuts fruits and vegetables is far more satisfying than a small back of chips from the vending machine. My wife and I take turns putting stuff together for lunch while we are making dinner. Also, I have been eating several small meals each day and not 3 squares. This keeps my hunger under control. I found that bananas grapefruit and apples are pretty filling and have almost no calories. Most important they have a ton vitamins. I try to keep this rule in mind, more fiber, less calories a little natural fat like in avocados and a whole lot less sugar.
I have to honest, sometimes I am hungry and fighting the urge to go off and have a big hamburger is out there, but for the most part as I watch my progress it is easy to say no. I have had some great beers over the last few weeks. Great Lakes Eliot Ness to name one, and that makes it all worth while.
Well that’s it for now. Remember beer is food. Let it replace bread in your diet. That’s the way Egyptians did it. In fact I am sure I heard someone in Mexico tell me some people call Carte Blanca bread.
More to come soon. I will pass along some good eats on my next post.

Hello everyone, I am back, about 10 pounds lighter and feeling optimistic. Here is what I’ve done. First I have cut out as much sugar from my diet as I can, success. I have now started eating a ton of raw fruits and vegetables. Then finally I have started doing yoga. I have to say other than my hangover from last night, I feel great.
This is what I’ve learned. Beer is delicious and some of the other things I have been eating are just okay. So I am compromising. More stuff I love and less stuff I don’t. Instead of frying food I have been baking. Taking my lunch to work has helped a ton. I found snacking on nuts fruits and vegetables is far more satisfying than a small back of chips from the vending machine. My wife and I take turns putting stuff together for lunch while we are making dinner. Also, I have been eating several small meals each day and not 3 squares. This keeps my hunger under control. I found that bananas grapefruit and apples are pretty filling and have almost no calories. Most important they have a ton vitamins. I try to keep this rule in mind, more fiber, less calories a little natural fat like in avocados and a whole lot less sugar.
I have to honest, sometimes I am hungry and fighting the urge to go off and have a big hamburger is out there, but for the most part as I watch my progress it is easy to say no. I have had some great beers over the last few weeks. Great Lakes Eliot Ness to name one, and that makes it all worth while.
Well that’s it for now. Remember beer is food. Let it replace bread in your diet. That’s the way Egyptians did it. In fact I am sure I heard someone in Mexico tell me some people call Carte Blanca bread.
More to come soon. I will pass along some good eats on my next post.

The Beer Drinker’s Diet.

2010-01-11T15:05:00.002-05:00

As part of my New Year’s resolution from 2006 I am working to loose a little weight. I joined Wait Watchers this morning and already I feel the panic coming on. Can a beer drinking lose weight without resorting to MGD 64 or Mic Ultra? I am willing to bet the answer is yes. Logic dictates I would have to drink 8,624 MGD 64s to get the flavor and enjoyment of just one good craft beer. I will be sure to let everyone know how it is going in the coming weeks.
When I decided to start this adventure I had a face a few facts. I am a beer drinker, I have always been a beer drinker, and will most likely always be a beer drinker. So if I plan on loosing weight then I have to take this in to account.
First thing I need to figure out is according to Weight Watchers’ diet fiber is good but the sugar from alcohol is bad, true whole grains good, fat is bad. So I am going to try and cut out all other unnecessary sugars throughout the week, then find beer that has any fiber and how much exercise I need to do to counter act my debauchery. This week all excess sugar is gone.
I am using this website` as a guide and will be working to learn WW Math to make some calculations. Here is what I have found out so far. For the most part beer does not have any fat, good, but has a ton of calories, bad. One beer can make up to 10% of my intake for a day. No big deal really because if I am more sensible about my food intake I can will have a little more wiggle room on night I drink beer. Now here comes exercised; it is no secret that light exercise is good for your heart, but does not really do much to burn calories. So that leaves on thing left to do, burn some major calories around days I will be having beer.
By the way, I am not indorsing Weight Watcher in any way. The reason I chose them is because their math is transparent, and I can control what I eat and it is easy to understand what kind of food does what in regards to weight loss. My ultimate hope is get to a point where I am just eating healthier overall and Weight Watchers seems like a good place to start. If any of you have tried this, let me know. I could use the advise…as long as the advise isn’t don’t drink beer. Hey worse comes to worse I will just switch to vodka.
Wish me luck
Write me at:
mister.whiskey@gmail.com

Some major changes are coming soon!

2010-01-06T10:00:00.000-05:00

Dear Brain Gravy listeners:

We at the Brain Gravy studios are working on some hopefully big changes. As from the feedback we have received, it appears that Brain Gravy 2.0 is proving to be a successful venue! We are hoping to maintain our current release schedule barring any foreseeable changes. We are also hoping to present some special episodes, including reports from Z live, who will be attending the Winter Olympics in Vancouver. We have some collaborative episodes planned with some of our fellow podcasters as well.

In addition, expect some big changes in our web presence! We are in the process of putting together an entirely new website, which will include our blogs, as well as show notes, beer reviews, alcohol reviews, general rants and raves, and some other things we are working on in the basement of BG studios, including expanding Z's Applebee pairings, Mr. Whiskey's This Week in Porn, and other fun features....

Ok....back to the studios. Until next time, Peace and Love to everyone! And happy imbibing!

JustHarmless

Busy recording...recording...recording

2009-12-22T09:31:00.000-05:00

Ugh! Its been a busy few weeks. I think Brain Gravy 2.0 has been going incredibly well! The crew and I have been recording at a furious pace, and BuBBy is working around the clock to get the episodes edited and out! I'd like to give a big shout out to the newest member of the Brain Gravy crew, The Art of Beer. Her expertise and perspective had been a wonderful addition to the podcast content...plus she can roll with the punches so to speak...and if you are a fan of ours, you know what I mean....

I haven't been active on the blog scene lately as I have just started at a new hospital in my other life...as well as continuing to help out at my old hospital; so burning the candle at both ends has left little time for blogging here. But now that I am more or less acclimated, I will try to update more often. In addition, we are working on an all new Brain Gravy website type experience, which will include show notes, beer and booze reviews, and our own general rants and raves...

Oy...look at the time.....time to get back to work!!!! Ciao for now!!!!

JH

Is Google and Facebook Evil?

2009-12-15T09:19:00.001-05:00

I don’t know how many people read this blog or how many people follow tech like I do, but something has happened recently that really makes me question the ethics of both Facebook and Google.

There is no question how much both these services have worked their way in to the public eye. Search without Google just seems crazy and let’s face it, there are a ton of people, my wife included who cannot imagine a life without Facebook. However, recent events leave the ethics of these companies in serous doubt.

Facebook implemented a new security protocol that leave many of its users’ privacy wide open, not to mention the recent risks found in the games Facebook makes available i.e. Mafia Wars. Google has CEOs saying “privacy is dead, get over it”. When it comes to these kind of arrogant statements, along with the statement “if you’re not doing anything wrong, you don’t have anything to worry about.” from a previous post, that makes me really feel like opting out of these services for good. I know this includes blogger. “Do no Evil” Google…remember?

Tell me what you think. Is Google and Facebook evil?

Here are a couple of articles written by far more talented writers than I.

http://motherjones.com/politics/2006/10/google-evil

http://www.nydailynews.com/tech_guide/2009/03/13/2009-03-13_is_google_evil.html

http://calacanis.com/2009/12/13/is-facebook-unethical-clueless-or-unlucky/

Please do some checking around.

Have a great week everyone.

Off the Subject.

2009-12-07T09:26:00.001-05:00

I imagine this will bet pulled, but I just have to say…I AM NOT A FUCKING CRIMINAL, SO STOPPING ASKING TO SEARCH MY SHIT WHEN i WALK WHEN i AM LEAVING THE STORE…just saying.

I have started denying people access to my search my bags when I am walking out of a store. After all, if I am not doing anything wrong I don’t have anything to worry about, right? Wander how long until I run out of places to shop. Does anyone ever stop to think that whole idea of “If you’re not doing anything wrong, you have nothing to worry about.” reeks of a police state.

I have a Stone Smoked Porter in the fridge. I think I should drink it. This will be a first time for me and I can’t wait. I hear it is like liquid steak. Not liquefied steak, just steak flavored liquid with alcohol in it .

Short post, got to get to work. Have a great week everybody, and never let the bastards get you down. Google that.

Whiskey:

Brain Gravy 2.0 - Episode 4 Hoppy Thanksgiving 2009 is out!

2009-11-24T06:06:00.001-05:00

Hey everyone!

Brain Gravy 2.0 Episode 4 is now uploaded! This is our Hoppy Thanksgiving 2009 episode where we review two amazing beers from Ommegang Brewery in Cooperstown, NY., their Hennepin and Three Philosophers.

-Three Philosophers may be the perfect Thanksgiving beer!
-Other show notes:

Two Thanksgiving recipes using beer (Thanks to the Homebrew Chef )
A reminiscing about Patty Smyth and Scandal
Where's Mr. Whiskey?

Cheers and enjoy!!!

And a Hoppy Thanksgiving to everyone from Brain Gravy!

Roadkill Friday

2009-11-20T05:48:00.000-05:00

Last night, my bud and I went to this place called Firewaters by my hospital in Hackensack, NJ. It is a chain of 4 restaurant/bars with other locations in Newark, DE and Atlantic City, NJ. The one by me is associated with a Hooters, with a contiguous space and open doorway between the two places. Their claim is 50 beers on tap and 100 in bottle. Now while they did have 50 beers on tap, unfortunately about 25% of them were the standards: Bud, Bud light, Yuengling, Coors, Blue Moon, etc. Then they had some next level beers like the Sierra Nevada Pale Ales and Sam Adams Cherry Wheat, etc.

I was not blown away by what else they offered. They listed the Rogue Chocolate Stout on tap, but was told they "just ran out" when I asked for it. They had replaced it with the Rogue Dead Guy Ale, which, I have to admit, was darned better on tap than out of the bottle. I followed that up with the Erie Rail Bender Scotch Ale, which, I have to say, was the first time I had had the Rail Bender, and, I really liked it. It definitely reminded me of the Oskar Blues Old Chub; it was so good, my friend drank it the rest of the night. (My friend, for the record, is a former Bud drinker whom I am slowly converting into a craft beer geek!) I then moved on to the Flying Fish Dubbel. I was pleasantly surprised: It reminded me a lot like the Hennepin. It was thoroughly enjoyable. With one beer left for the night, I decided to go for the Abita Purple Haze. Excited to try this wheat beer, I was once again told they were "out" but they did have the Sam Adams Cherry Wheat. I started to feel like the Monty Python cheese shop sketch, and was ready to get really annoyed.

What stopped me? The bartender was a sweet young woman who looked great in a bustier. Her breasts were pretty much falling out of her top. She was very nice, and had absolutely no beer knowledge. Later on last night, two more bartenders came to work as the place got busier, both also looking quite nice in their bustiers, and also with little to no real beer knowledge. So..was I going to argue with that? Hells no! I just finished the night with a Sierra Nevada Pale Ale and called it a night.

Overall, I thought from a purely beer experience, I'd give it a B minus. The more exciting beers (to me) were out...all beers were served cold, all the beers were served in pint glasses (the dubbel should have been served in a chalice) and the bartenders had no beer knowledge. From the perspective of a dirty old man, it was very nice. The use of the Hooters formula really distracted me from the fact that these bartenders knew nothing. And, it was a real fun night out with my friend. So, overall, it was a really nice night out.

Bored at Work. The Ramblings of a Sober Mr. Whiskey

2009-11-18T21:42:00.003-05:00

My father rarely said clever things or said much that would be described as a deeply prophound. I imagine this little obstacle is what prevents him from making the jump from being a writer, and being a successful writer. It is a lot like a mechanic that doesn’t really know much about motors. One thing he did say that will stick with me always is, “When it comes to creating, “keeping on practicing your bad habits, after a while it becomes style.”

Well it is Wednesday, and as many of you know, Wednesday is my Friday. So that means Saturday is my Sunday and Sunday is my Monday. If you’re keeping score I have 2 Saturdays. Figure that out. For now we are only going to worry abut Wednesday i.e. Friday. My wife was good enough to pick me up a six of Tap Rooms No. 21 Red Ale. Good Stuff so far. As usual I have to have a little time with it before I can say for sure.

Next week is Thanksgiving, and can’t wait. Oyster dressing is on the horizon folks, and I have to tell you…I love oyster dressing. Also my annual night before Thanksgiving festival will be under way. I don’t know about you all, but the night before Thanksgiving I love to work up a nice drunk so when I wake up the next day, I am staving. Come to think of it this is a bad idea for health reason, but screw it, Thanksgiving only come once a year.

By the way, I was watching some movie on the Lifetime network the other night. This is what I find funny. Those films are so low budget they can’t afford to buy the rights to the original music so they get some starving musician to put together a song that sounds like the song they want, but isn’t exactly it. Keeps them from getting sued. The funny thing is these songs sound like absolute crap. Check it out sometimes when your bored. That is about the only time it is a good idea to watch Lifetime…garbage.

Send me a link to your favorite youtube videos. I want to see them mister.whiskey@gmail.com.

Well that is it for me for a few days. I hope you all have a great weekend and hope to see you around the web.

Finally Friday!

2009-11-13T05:32:00.000-05:00

I have only one thing to say: TGIF!!! It has been a LONG LONG week, with real intense days at work, a screwed up sleep cycle, and a brain that goes into shutdown after getting home from work. I hate falling asleep at 8 pm, and waking up 2-3 in the morning. It just doesn't work for me! If I keep this up, one day I'll just jump in my car and go hit the gym at 3 am (I belong to a 24 hour gym), and, then maybe get back to the days when I had those consistent, wonderful AM workouts.

In any case, most of my plans for the weekend fell through, which, in hindsight, I think is a good thing, because, at this point, I have no energy to do any of the events that were planned. Tomorrow night, we are recording the next Brain Gravy episode, which means I get to go on a beer run later. The problem is that I can never just pick up the beers I am supposed to buy....I always see a few other tasty items, and just can't resist. I am hoping the Oskar Blues Ten Fidy is going to finally be at my local go-to craft beer store....a case might be in order...although I think if I brought home a case, my wife would castrate me! Our second refrigerator has slowly become my beer fridge; it is so stocked with beers, that there is no room for anything else, which is a source of constant fighting between my wife and I. However, I do have a secret weapon: I throw a few bottles of her favorite wines her way, and the beer fridge fight is done!

In any case, Happy Friday to everyone out there!!! I will be on Tokbox later celebrating this glorious event with a few of my favorite beers, and hopefully a few of my favorite people. Cheers!

My weekend in Baltimore

2009-11-11T06:38:00.003-05:00

Somehow, I ended up in Baltimore last weekend. Trust me...I am not complaining. Baltimore is one of my favorite cities. I went to college there, and got to spend some time working at Johns Hopkins Medical Center, which was both an honor and a priviledge, but I digress...Its amazing to me to see over the years how Baltimore has renovated itself. When I was in college there, the Inner Harbor was just being built. Now, to see how the Waterfront area has been renovated, with construction extending to Fells Point and Federal Hill, it brings a tear to my eye to see how this wonderful city is modernizing itself. I have to point out, in fairness, that a colleague of mine, who is a native Baltimorian, feels the city is going too far, and I can see his point. I do agree that there comes a point where all the new construction does cross the line, and, in my opinion, Baltimore is almost at that point...

In any case, the one part of Baltimore that retains most of its old school charm (remember...Baltimore is known as Charm City) is Fells Point. Although there is some new construction and renovation of the periphery of Fells Point, the heart of this part of Baltimore is untouched. The 100+ bars in an 8 block radius, the cobblestone streets, the regular cast of street characters...it is perhaps my favorite place on the planet! (mind you...I haven't been to many places....and this is just my opinion). Fells Point is the home to three of my favorite bars: DuClaw, Max's on Broadway and The Horse.

DuClaw is found at the mouth of Fells Point at Bond Street. Its one of the first sights you see as you enter the Point from the Waterfront. Its in a perfect location, being a stone's throw from the Harbor. Picturesque, with lots of windows and an open feel, it is, to me, the way I start all my trips to Baltimore. The food is excellent; I would put it in the category of a higher end gastropub. Generous portions, good price. But what makes this place is the beer. I strongly recommend you go the website (linked on the name) to get a full description, but suffice it to say their beers are excellent. I always go for the sampler menu, which includes their 6 year rounds and anywhere from 4-6 seasonals. This time around, I brought home a growler of their Mad Bishop, which is their seasonal Oktoberfest.

Max's on Broadway or Max's Taphouse, is located on Broadway in the heart of Fells Point. It is located right by the Broadway Market with a great corner location. The fun begins when you enter Max's. It features a long bar running the length of the place. It features over 100 beers on tap and about 200 in bottles. Plus, they serve the beers at the temperature they were meant to be served! What always amazes me about this place is how the bartenders know exactly where each of the tapped beers are located! Its outrageous to see the bartenders running like madmen back and forth along the bar! This weekend I had the Brooklyn Black Chocolate Stout on tap and the Oskar Blues Ten Fidy on tap. The BCS was excellent, but I have to say the Ten Fidy was OUTRAGEOUS on tap!!! You have to watch it at Max's...you can get wicked polluted very quickly (like I did!).

Last, but not least, is the Horse You Came in On, or The Horse. Its this delightful little dive bar on Thames Street. Its famous for being the place that was the favorite of Edgar Allen Poe. For me, its my favorite dive bar on the planet! The atmosphere is not to be missed! The beers and drinks are just okay, and they do have live music, which is hit or miss, but the atmosphere makes it as fun a place as I've ever been. Fun bartenders, barmaids dressed their slutty best, with old wood bars and floors, brick/cement walls....its wonderful!!! The Horse is a great place to spend a bunch of time in for just a darned good time!

Well...that was my weekend. I love Baltimore. I love Fells Point. And my wife's reluctance to move there is weakening....I'm planning on going back in about a month, weather permitting, for another gruelling weekend! Cheers!

What to do?

2009-11-10T22:58:00.001-05:00

We turned the corner and find ourselves facing the Thanksgiving holiday. Much like most of you I will be spending my time with family and doing my best to act like a viable part of society, but we all know the truth. While everyone is sitting around talking about the mandarin details of their grueling likes I will be thinking about beer.

So I would like to open the floor up to each of you. Please help me. What kind of beer should I buy for Thanksgiving. Please keep in mind, I have to make it through a whole day of jeering and glad handing members of my family I don’t hear from or see that often and I will most likely be playing some poking that night, so please don’t bog me down with some hi alcohols beers. Please help me pick out some nice full flavored ales.

Thanks in advance for your suggestions. I will let you all know how it goes.

Yankees win!

2009-11-05T06:25:00.000-05:00

Just a very quick post congratulating my favorite team, the New York Yankees on winning their 27th World Championship when they won the 2009 World Series!!! Anyone who knows me knows that I bleed Yankee pinstripes...I have been a fanatic Yankees fan since I was a very young child (I remember watching my first Yankees game when I was 4 years old!) For us Yankees fan, its been a long 9 years since our last championship, and I will savor this one for a while!

Having all the nice new free agents are nice; we couldn't have won this championship without them, but, to me, the sweetest thing is what has been dubbed the "Core 4": Derek Jeter, Andy Pettitte, Jorge Posada, and, of course, Mariano Rivera. These are the four players who have been there since the start of the glory days and were all there back when we won in 1996. The best part: they are all home grown! Each of them drafted and nurtured by the organization. And, in an era where players change teams like most of us change socks, its a blessing to be a fan of a team that had the foresight and money to keep these players New York Yankees! I acknowledge us Yankee fans are spoiled by rooting for a team that has such wealth and spends the money; however, let us never forget these are the rules allowed by Major League Baseball, so don't blame us for having owners that want to win!!!

So...once again....in the words of the immortal John Sterling..."Ballgame over! Yankees win! THE YANKEES WIN!!! Congratulations to our 2009 World Series champions, the NY Yankees!!!

Brain Gravy 2.0 - Episode 3 Pumpkin Thumpin' now uploaded!!!

2009-11-01T08:30:00.002-05:00

Hey everyone!!!! A belated Happy Halloween! Episode 3 is now uploaded to the Brain Gravy Libsyn website or just look for Brain Gravy on iTunes!!!

In this episode we review an array of Pumpkin Beers and Crown Royal. Unhinge your cerebellum, grab a beverage and give us a listen. Cheers!

Happy Halloween Everybody!

2009-10-31T01:26:00.003-04:00

Well here we are the eve of my favorite night of the year. Oh yes, it’s Halloween. Who does not have great stories of Beggar’s Night? Running wild in the streets and grabbing mass amounts of candy from total strangers. Excellent.

How many of us had to take their candy to the local hospital to be x-rayed for razor blades and needles?

How about that crazy lady who lived in every neighborhood that handed out candy that was covered and cat hair and smelled like cat piss.

Who can forget such great classics such as throwing eggs at the house whose owner handed out that shit candy? You know the stuff I mean, the ones that looked like Metropolitan ice cream and those marshmallow peanuts. What about that old woman who, despite all the warnings on TV took the time to cook up those home-made goodies that parents wouldn’t let us eat because it may be poisoned?

I remember all that and so much more. “It’s the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown.”, and Christina Smalls dressed like a valley girls tripping in her mother’s heels, giving Seth and I a perfect shot of her underwear. Fuck that was awesome.

Some day I will tell you all about the time my best friend and his wife came to a Halloween party dressed as Mickey and Mini Mouse. He got so drunk on the “jage” he passed out in the middle of the living room floor with his arms wrapped around a jock-o-lantern filled with jello shots. serial I think you call it.

Tomorrow night my wife and I will be handing out candy and drinking hard apple cider by the firepit. We will be dong our part to make a safe and fun night for the trick-or-treaters.

It is my honest wish to all of you, have a safe and happy Halloween and look out for one another.

Beer from the Internet

2009-10-29T06:30:00.001-04:00

Ugh! Frustration! Catch-22 to the max!

What do I mean? I mean that ordering beer on the internet has got to be frustrating and a major dilemna, at least for me, for this reason: shipping costs! I just tried to order some beers from a website called Liquid Solutions. They offer coffee, tea, but feature BEER!!! They have a nice selection of over 700 beers, which is, to me at least, an impressive number. They are, of course, missing the one heavy hitter I am dying to get, which is anything from Three Floyds, as well as Goose Island, but I am not surprised at things like that. I have been dying to try Russian River's Pliny the Elder, but, of course, with my luck, it is out of stock! So I went to order a few beers I can't find here by me in New Jersey, including the Russian River Damnation and the Rogue XS Old Crustacean. I never like to go crazy when trying an unknown site, so I decided to order about 5 bomber bottles of different beers. So far so good....

The cost of the 5 bottles came to be about $41.....not bad....but because of the way they ship the beer, the fucking shipping costs came out to be $38!!!!!! Now, personally, I have a hard time paying as much for shipping as I do for the beer. So the website nicely shows the schemata of the shipping boxes, giving you the friendly reminder that in order to save shipping costs, order more beer. Well...to fill the boxes then runs into costs of well over $100, depending on the beer one buys.

UGH!!!! I want some of these beers, but Mr. Cheap Jew (yes...I am Jewish....) in me doesn't want to pay for all that shipping, and I really don't want to buy a lot of beer from a place I am unfamiliar with yet...maybe I'll just take the plunge...or maybe I will take a visit this weekend to my incredible beer store, the Oak Tree Buy Rite Liquors, which is about an hour's drive, but does have over 900 types of beer, where the shipping will be free, and I will get that free drinking vessel when I spend over $100.00.

Ok...had to rant...hopefully I am not alone with my dilemna...

Recovering from last night's recording

2009-10-24T19:07:00.001-04:00

Last night we recorded our 4th episode of Brain Gravy 2.0, which was our martini episode. BuBBy, Z, Whiskey and myself welcomed our special guest, good friend, and expert martini drinker, Paradox, to the party. And it was a party! Drinking martinis for the better part of 4 hours is probably not something one should do on a regular basis! By the end of the recording session, I think it was safe to say that everyone was pretty well in the bag. But I know I learned a great deal. My forte has more been in the realm of craft beer, and I admit that my knowledge of harder alcohols like gin, vodka, tequila and the like is pretty weak, except that I know what is good, and what I like to drink.

Last night, as I said, was an education for me. I learned a great deal about gin: its history, how it is made, the different types of gin. I learned a great deal about the martini, including its history, shaking vs. stirring, different garnishes and the importance of the olive, vermouth ratios, etc. I myself did a spectrum of bad to good gins, starting with a martini made with Seagrams gin (very bad), moving on to Bombay Sapphire gin (very good) and ending with Hendricks gin (my Hendricks deflowering, and an unbelievable top shelf gin). It made me sad that it took so long to finally try Hendricks; or maybe that was a good thing, because I'd probably be drinking a lot more martinis than I have in the past....

It was a blast recording, but I will get the final evaluation from BuBBy in the near future: things that seem to be going great when a bit under the influence don't always translate in the sober state, but I think last night's content was spot on. We covered so much ground, that I think this will end up being a two part episode. In any case, I just wanted to jot down some thoughts, get them out there, and I do look forward to another Hendricks martini later this evening....and you should too!!!

Brain Gravy 2.0 - Episode 2 Some Stouts

2009-10-21T12:54:00.001-04:00

Yes! Episode 2 of Brain Gravy 2.0 is now out!

BuBBy is a little burnt out with work, life, etc and that's
about as creative of a title there will be for now.
The new direction of the podcast is reviews for the Gravy of the Brain and reviews it is. (For those who need a hint as to what we are talking about, its ALCOHOL!!!) In this episode we drink the Founders Breakfast Stout, the Southern Tier Mokah and some Cognac.
Cheers!

The Weekend is Over, Let Vacation Begin!

2009-10-19T22:16:00.001-04:00

Hello everybody. It’s your old pal Mr. Whiskey. Had a great start to my vacation over the weekend. Got a chance to meet up with an Internet buddy and share some beer…thank you Paradox. The most notable beer we shared was Stone Imperial Russian Stout. I have to tell you, that is some smashingly good stuff. I will be grabbing some more this week.

I am settling in and watching the Broncos and the Chargers tonight. On that subject of football. Over the last few years “Monday Night Football” has really struggled with announcers, I honestly think they finally have it right.

Tonight I am enjoying Rogue Dead Guy Ale and thinking about joining my buds for Martini Monday at www.tokbox.com.

I am off work for the week so I plan on doing some sampling and some other fun things. Tomorrow is $6.00 movie day, so I am thinking of checking out “Zombieland”. Or maybe I will just sleep in, get some Chinese food, and watch movies.

Finally, here’s what sucks. My Xbox red-ringed. a couple of weeks ago. I was planning on getting some game time in while I on vacation but obviously life has other plans for me.

Well, that’s it for me so far gang. Have a great week and remember, Live, love and drink beer.

And now, some link love.

Weekend recap

2009-10-19T14:41:00.002-04:00

The end of the weekend is always a sad time for me...especially Sunday nights, because it means that work will be upon us in a very short time. This weekend was not as bad, because I happened to be off today (the price being a fun weekend full of call!), so I will get the same anxiety in a few hours from now that I would normally get yesterday. However, for me, tonight, there is Yankees baseball followed by a pretty good Monday Night Football game (Denver vs. San Diego....not only two good football teams, but cities that are home to some awesome beers as well!). If you didn't know by now, I am a sports junkie, this being my favorite time of year: End of baseball, football in full swing, with hockey and basketball just starting. But, that's for another post.

The weekend was an okay one. We took off a week from recording an episode, because we have the editing on the next episode well in hand by BuBBy, with the third booze episode recorded. In a production meeting last night (ok...it was myself, BuBBy and Z shooting the shit, but future episode concepts were discussed, making it a production meeting as far as I am concerned), what was exciting for me was the fact that we will not just talk about beer, but plan to also talk about other types of alcohol, which, for me, is fantastic, because it means that I will get to educate myself, since what I know about alcohol outside of beer can fit inside a thimble...so the goal for me will be to educate you, our loyal listeners and blog readers (all 7 of you by last count) as I educate myself.

The next episode we tentatively plan to drink and discuss the classic martini, with Mr. Whiskey wanting to do Gibsons. Luckily, we have resident martini and gin experts BuBBy and Z, and maybe we'll throw in a special guest. I was already warned by BuBBy that if I show up with appletinis, I am off the podcast...so I will be going out and buying a bottle of Hendricks sometime this week to supplement my Bombay Sapphire Gin. Other episode concepts are being whiteboarded, and we will all look forward to sharing our future drinking adventures with you!

Until next time...peace and love!!

JH

It's Friday!!!

2009-10-16T08:14:00.000-04:00

I don't know about you, but Friday has become my favorite day of the week. Maybe its because it signifies the end of a long work week, with a few days to relax. Maybe its the realization that you don't have to awaken to the sound of an alarm signalling the beginning of another day from hell. Maybe its something else altogether...

For me, it means all of that and more. It means I get to stay up half the night if I want. It means I get to indulge in one of my favorite habits: the drinking of fine craft beers and hanging out with friends. The beauty of the latter is that, to me, we live in this wonderful age where there are no longer any sort of geographical boundaries to friendships anymore. Thanks to the internet, flash technology and clever companies and websites, I get to talk to wonderful friends all over the world in real time. I am in New Jersey, and I get to talk to friends in Virginia, Ohio, Indiana, Wisconsin, Maine, Minnesota, California, Canada...all in real time!!!! It truly is a wonderful thing!

Our technology of choice is a website called Tokbox. It allows video conferencing in real time an allows up to 20 people in a same window chat, although, I have to admit, it does better with 10-12 people at most. The video resolution is darned good, and the audio quality is very clear (except for me...I tend to have some degradation over time, where I start to garble, which has been affectionately named by BuBBy as "Darthing" because it sounds like Darth Vader. Luckily it clears up with a reboot..but I still need to get a new analog to USB adapter..). Tokbox also allows us to share videos and pictures right in the chat window. Its a wonderful technology, and a far cry from our early days on Userplane (the less said the better about Userplane these days...).

For those of you who know us, you also know that we are craft beer fanatics...and, as such, have refocused our podcast to include a great deal about beer and craft beer reviews, although we also like to drink and talk about booze in general; mainly drink...yeah...lots of drinking...

So, as today is Friday, I look forward to later tonite, where I will grab a good craft beer, probably keep my Jagermeister close at hand for a few shots, settle in, and enjoy a wonderful night of hanging out with my friends. Come look us up and join us if the mood so moves you. Cheers!!!!!

We're back!!!!

2009-10-13T15:15:00.000-04:00

After a long hiatus...way too long hiatus, we are BACK and with a vengeance. We have decided to shift the focus of the podcast, and we hope you all like it! After years of geeking amongst ourselves about beer and booze, we decided to change the focus of the podcast to geeking on beer and booze, with our own Brain Gravy style. Expect more than just booze talk, with some of the old Brain Gravy "stuff" thrown in every now and again....

Episode 8 is actually our first beer episode, with episode 9 in the editing room and episode 10 already recorded! (I was going to say taped, which I do often; its just a product of my age....).

We also hope to have companion posts here on the blog, which might involve anything and everything. BuBBy promises a scathing expose on hand sanitizers, and JJJENNNNN threatens to give her view of Frankenberry...

So...fasten your seatbelts...we are back!!! Hope you all enjoy!

Gotta move again with this blog!

2008-11-18T06:42:00.000-05:00

To all our 3 readers, I apologize for having not posted here for a while. Its been a long, hard road lately...as you can see by how long it took to get out Episode 7! But, I will try to post here some more. I can't promise how often I post, but I will do my best.

Ok..I know this is perhaps the lamest post ever, sort of like some of my posts in the old Tiki Bar TV forums, but I wanted to get something out there, and this is all I have time to do!!!

JH

Where NumberSix Discusses a Film that doesnt exist yet in a depth that is really unhealthy

2008-10-19T16:34:00.000-04:00

As I see pictures from the new Trek film, I had a few observations I figured I'd share.

I'm both "happy" and "well, it's cool" I mean sure, on a pure sci-fi scale I always want more good stuff, and lets face it, Star Trek can be awesome, when the focus is on that universe and not on keeping the ego the ego of the current Captain, Spock, Data actors happy about their personal characters growth. J.J. Abrams has done some stuff that I like a great deal, And I really like Damon Lindelof, who is one of the producers, and trust him to do it right (he has masterminded pretty much the coolest aspects of Lost, and understands fans and fan reactions.
In fact, one of my favorite things about Lost is the official Lost podcast, these guys "get" "new" media, they understand fans, because they ARE fans, which is a good thing.

I like his take on the need for balance between enticing an audies and spoiling the experience.

Part of Lindelof's efforts to preserve Star Trek secrecy, he says, can be attributed to his own experiences as a fan of sci-fi entertainment. "As a fan, I'll always remember when I was kid my dad pulled me out of school to see Return of the Jedi, and this was in '83," Lindelof remembered. "We were standing on line and they were selling programs which were available for the first time that day, and I bought one with my own money for like four dollars, and I opened it up and I started looking through it and I saw Jabba the Hutt for the first time on the day that I saw the movie. Here's this character that had been referred to all throughout Star Wars and Empire who I'd never seen before, and I had no idea what he looked like."

"I wish that I'd not opened the program because how much more exciting would it have been to me to be brought into that room with Bib Fortuna and Luke Skywalker and be introduced to Jabba the Hutt the way I was supposed to be."

I mean sure, I'll never be happy, I'm a purist, and things like having a 1701 bridge that looks more modern than the original BEFORE the original is weird to me, (Even after Enterprise) but I'm a relic, and will quickly get over it.
(besides, I think this image shows that you could keep the old bridge pretty much the same, with some slight updates and.. well it's pretty impressive on its own, it looked cheap because the building materials WERE cheap, not the design. The design became mythic, powerful, you see a layout like that and you know immediatly where you are what it is. It works perfectly.

Hell, lets just say it, it's THE bridge, all other ones are pretenders, secondary, afterthoughts.

I'm cool with the look in this pic, the capsule looks just clunky enough to be rugged, probably a escape pod that ol Kirk used to get a bomb or a Orion slave girls dildo off the Enterpise. (actually i view the release of this image is filler, " it's an an adventure movie you say?... SUPRISING!, I was expecting more of a My Dinner With Andre vibe...")

Actually, after the last few Star Trek movies, i take that back.... since the second to last one WAS closer to a second rate episode of Masterpiece Theater... minus the good. Than Star Trek. And the last one was... well, the only one I never saw in the theater, and I saw ALL of them in the theater, the first five, opening day first show.

This is a close up of New Spock getting physical with New Kirk.

It poses some interesting issues and observations.

A) I like the fact that they were able to scour the universe and find cloth that was actually uglier than the original costumes, well done!
B) While he looks OK, I see this and just hear clockwork ticking in the background.
C) This shot shows the potential downside, Nimoy is an amazing actor, and even though it's easy to forget, he, more than any writer, really created Spock, this makes me realise that the character in the original series could have easily been crap, and it was the fact that Nimoy has the ability to convey layers and layers of thought, conflict, "character" without saying a word. Or better yet, while basically reading a spreadsheet aloud.... I would be very afraid to follow up on that guy, he's a master. And this just... well, doesnt look like a masterful acting moment, but i could be wrong.

But I'm not.

Seems to be a picture of the villian here, since a major plot point in one of the best episodes of the original series, was that we had never seen a Romulan before... well lets just hope that this is some sort of Future dude, who is never seen by any of the main characters or whatever, because that would kind of be a shame. I know it's a reboot, and they arent sticking with the mythology exactly, but cmon, dont fuck with something that worked so completely well. And was used so brilliantly to reflect the past of the Vulcan people as well as being a lightning rod for a classic Trek take on racism, paranoia that was the sort of thing that elevated it beyond being just a silly sci-fi adventure show like Voyage To The Bottom Of The Sea but in space!

All said, no game changers here, and some decent signs of hope, as long as they take the time, to flesh out the relationships, to understand that yes, Star Trek was a adventure show, but the real charm of the orginal was in the characters and the ability to hold a mirror to current events as much as the OH-CHRIST-THIS-IS-AWESOME-I-WANT-TO-SEE-THIS-MOVIE-NOW-ITS-THE-BEST-THING-EVER-MADE-BY-HUMANS-I'M-GONNA-GO-BUY-A-TENT-AND-START-A-LINE-NOW-BEST-MOVIE-EVER-HOLY-CRAP-YAY-YAY-YAY-YAY!!!!

I seem to have geekasmed on myself, excuse me while I clean up after myself.

(was this to long to go for the joke?)

was I joking?

Dont answer that, I know the answer.

And yes, I think I scared myself by how far I went.

8^)

Good Eats Cheap/Bad Eats Expensive

2008-10-19T16:24:00.000-04:00

Lately, I've been thinking of some of the foods i used to eat all the time.
I used to pretty much live off Falafel in New Orleans (When i wasn't eating... well I lived in New Orleans, you figure it out!)

But there was a store that sold the greatest Falafel mix in bulk, and I would make a crapload and just munch it for days and days.
And I just haven't found a mix that I like as much since (in the DECADES since I might add) I need to figure out my own mix, I really do.

Anyway, I also used to enjoy dressing up Ramen noodles back when they were considered exotic. (can you imagine a time?) of course, since I'm in solitary confinement for a few days, and really having a hard time talking, or even thinking, Youtube and sleeping are my friends.

And in looking up my old friend Ramen, I found a few videos that amused me, and I just had to share these with you my dear friends..

First up, Robo-Ramen, I know it's wrong on every level, but isn't everything better when served by a vending machine?

The answer seems to be... no.

RoboRamen from eric alba on Vimeo.

This one... this one is named the Recession Special, but I name it awesome, I mean, it's a tad long, but I dont care, the length is perfect, and I want to hang with this guy, and eat here! When he opens the bag it's like motherfucking Christmas Morning!

Recession Special from eric alba on Vimeo.

We suck!

2007-09-04T15:17:00.000-04:00

Ok...I have to apologize for not posting in a while. We just suck! Between work, family, some of us moving, taking weeks to edit a podcast episode, and just plain partying too much, we have neglected this blog way too long!!!

So look for entries in the near future! By the way, Episode 4 is out, and we are busily working on Episode 5. Plus, if I find the time to get off my ass and concentrate a bit more, I'll actually get the website up......

Look back here soon!!!

JH

BRAIN GRAVY Episode 003: Something Seeming Slightly Surreal!

2007-06-11T21:58:00.000-04:00

BRAIN GRAVY Episode 003: Something Seeming Slightly Surreal!

DOWNLOAD HERE

SUBSCRIBE via iTunes

FIREBALL!!! The battle cry of thirsty! PRESENT ARMS! The charge of those needing another drink! And with that, off we go with the next installment of Brain Gravy! You wanted more, you've got more! You needed more drunken doctor stories, you've got them! You needed readings from classic plays, we've got it! You needed the inside story of what women really want....its here!!! We've heard your cries, your clamoring for more...and we deliver....and in a big way!!! Heck, there's even cup-a-soup. For your patience, you are getting a special SUPER SIZED episode of Brain Gravy! More drunken tomfoolery coming your way. From the extensive annals of audio, once again, comes Episode 3 of Brain Gravy! So sit back, mix up your favorite cocktail, prepare your shot, as we proudly present the next episode of BRAIN GRAVY!

* Mrs. Spooky's rendition of the warning!
* The Drunken Doctor and more stories!
* Dean does Shakespeare!
* NAGG gives her take on penis size!
* Sick Puppy shares his sheep tips!
* DEAR BRAIN GRAVY!
* What's Six drinking?
* The true meaning of love
* Toast to Vinnie
* What makes Spooky gag?
* EC's in the house
* The Best Shout Out Ever
* And much, much more!
* Cheers!

Thanks to:
* Mrs. Spooky
* Jen
* Lilone (pronounced lil-ony)
* t3chnomanc3r
* Canadian Avenger
* Dean-O
* Evil (we miss your presence lately!!!!! Say hi to Mr. Evil!!)
* Paradox
* Hula Honey
* Screaming Viking
* Notagirlygirl
* LizzieLizzie
* Shel and Bill
* Elijah Craig
* Elle
* SickPuppy
* Spoon
* Mr. Whiskey
* Eggs - whose audio has definitely been included in this episode
* The artist formerly known as Mamagoot, AKA Valentine
* Artifishall (I never caught the name of his podcast....)
* Thing under the Stairs
* Red Curacao
* Z live from Pluto
* Keelhauler
* Zombified Projectionist
* Kaptn Willy and his amazing ukulele
* and, of course, soon to be BuBBy's new neighbor, TANGOROA!

Shout outs to:

* First, and foremost: Doctor Tiki, Johnny Johnny, and Lala over at Tiki Bar TV www.tikibartv.com...thanks to Doc and JJ for the mention on TWit TV podcast

* Kurt, Eggs and Estry over at The Real Happy Hour www.therealhappyhour.com

* Spoon and Sickpuppy at www.shouldidrinkthat.com...awesome podcast...and thanks for the wonderful shout out to Brain Gravy in the last episode of Should I Drink That podcast....

* Clarke, Hogdawg and Gonzo over at Dude Night, www.dudenight.net...thanks for the big shout out to Brain Gravy in the last episode of Dude night...great podcast

* Jeffery T and the gang at The good beer show: www.thegoodbeershow.com

* Groucho, CHUD and Angry Barcode over at The Beer Report www.thebeerreport.com

* Rick and Dick over at Big Foamy Head: www.bigfoamyhead.com

* and anyone else we forgot.

Musical credits:
Vortex by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Deliberate Thought by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Blue Lights by Beat Under Control from their album The Introduction available from http://www.magnatune.com. Used under the Magnatune podcasting license.

The following obtained from theFreesoundProject and used under the Creative Commons Sampling License (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/sampling+/1.0/)

By Charel Sytze (http://freesound.iua.upf.edu/usersViewSingle.php?id=117199):

runnertrainbirds1.mp3 (http://freesound.iua.upf.edu/samplesViewSingle.php?id=35048)

By RHumphries:
rbh thunder storm.wav

By greyseraphim:
heart beat.mp3

and in conclusion, Jen rocks.

Adjustable breast implants

2007-04-27T11:12:00.000-04:00

Dear Gravyheads,

This isnt a product that i really care about, aside from the obvious laughter at the though of pumping up body parts on a whim (insert joke --->HERE<---)
However, in chat last night, some interest was expressed by the ladies in this device, so as a public service, i offer this article from boing boing.

These breast-implants can be adjusted after surgery, varying the size of your fake tits based on your post-operative feelings about them until you're perfectly happy with your wobbly plastic boobs.

The Spectrum is a technologically innovative design that allows the surgeon to continue making adjustments to the breast after your breast augmentation operation. A small, removable fill tube is left temporarily attached to the breast implant after surgery. The tube is accessible to the physician by injection through the skin. In a simple office procedure, breast implant size can be varied until you have achieved the result you desire. At this point, the fill tube is removed (again, in a routine office visit) and a self-sealing valve immediately closes and seals the breast implant.

Link

Finally scientists focus on something that will help our daily lives.

2007-04-26T09:44:00.000-04:00

greetings Gravyheads!
I stumbled on this little article, and all i can say is.. huzzah!
Although I'm curious, I've always viewed perfect head as an artform, something to be worshiped and truly spectacular when your able to recieve it.

will this change all that? When excellence becomes the norm, what becomes excellent?

Your thoughts as always, are greatly appreciated.

Scientists are working on ensuring we all get the best head possible.

The best gelato in the world.. sailor Style.

2007-04-19T14:18:00.000-04:00

Dear friends and drunkards,

THIS, screams roadtrip.

Aloha Monkey
What: Gelato made from fresh pineapples, lemons, coconut milk, and Sailor Jerry rum.
Why: Possibly the most delicious concoction ever created.
When: Mon.-Thurs., 7:30 a.m.-10 p.m.; Fri., 7:30 a.m.-midnight; Sat., 8:30 a.m.-midnight; Sun., 10 a.m.-10 p.m.
Where: Capogiro, 119 S. 13th St. (215-351-0900).

The Science of Cider.

2007-04-10T11:35:00.000-04:00

Greetings!

So, what can we learn from 150 year old beer?

Seems like we can learn a lot! Although if we want to brew any of our own, we best get started now!

Heres a article from the Times Online.

Cheers!

I'm not dead...yet!

2007-03-30T07:54:00.000-04:00

Dear Gravyheads:

Every once in a while I come across some interesting things in my readings, whether it be the Internet, the newspaper or books I read. I want to give a big shout out to a series of books I really think are groovy; these are Uncle John's Bathroom Readers, published by the Bathroom Readers' Institute. They are a series of books each consisting of about 500 pages of stories, including trivia, culture, history, science, etc. They are meant to be read while you spend time in the bathroom doing...well...you know what....and makes it a more "quality" time. The stories are divided into different lengths based on the amount of time you think you will be spending in the bathroom, and are divided into Quickies, Regular Length, and Extended Sitting Section for, as they describe, for "those leg-numbing experiences."

As an example, I'd like to share a story from Vol. 14, The Supremely Satisfying Bathroom reader:

The title of the story (and its under the Quicky category) is Rumors of my Death...It has three stories, but I will share only one (sort of a teaser....).

DECEASED: Jose Estrada, 48, of Baytown, TX

NEWS OF HIS DEATH: In February 1996, Estrada went for a run on a jogging trail near his house. He didn't know it, but just a few minutes earlier paramedics had taken away the body of a man who had collapsed and died while jogging on the same trail. The dead man wasn't carrying any identification; all he had was a set of GM car keys. So a sheriff's deputy went back to the scene to see if the keys fit any of the cars. For some reason, the keys fit in Estrada's GM truck.

The deputy traced the license plate to the Estrada residence. He broke the news to Estrada's wife and took her to the hospital to identify the body. "There was a tube in the man's mouth, and tape over his mouth and eyes, so I couldn't really see his face," said Estrada's wife. She then positively identified the body as Jose. Later, she blamed it on being in a state of shock.

RESURRECTION: While all of this was going on, Estrada finished his jog and stopped at the grocery store before heading home. As he was putting away the groceries, his wife's boss called to offer condolences. Informed of his own death, Estrada raced to the hospital to tell his wife it was a mistake, arriving just after she signed the death certificate. "After I stopped hugging him, I started crying," his wife said. "And I told him, 'If you ever die on me again, I'll kill you myself!'"

I have spent many an hour reading these delightful tidbits while spending some necessary "me" time in the bathroom. I would highly recommend these books if you are so inclined and enjoy reading while in the toilet!!!

The perfect footwear for your next tiki gathering

2007-03-27T22:25:00.000-04:00

Sandals with built-in flask

Reef's Dram Sandals have a built in foot-flask for your whiskey-soaked wanders down the beach. Link (via Uncrate) See also:

Beach-sandals with built-in bottle opener

Don't kill that sheep!!!

2007-03-22T07:18:00.000-04:00

A public service report by Dr. Harmless!

Hello fellow Gravyheads! After perusing the Brain Gravy whiteboard, and some intense internet research, I have found some very bizarre and strange sex laws that involve not only different countries of the world, but different states in our own country here in the United States! As a public service to you, our dear listeners and readers, I feel it my duty to make you aware of these laws, lest you find yourself someday in some Turkish prison walking a circle and talking unintelligibly the rest of your life!

Now mind you, if, after reading this report, and still decide to continue to break the law, try to do it discretely. If you can't do it discretely, then at least take pictures or, even better video and/or audio, and send it to BrainGravyPodcast@gmail.com!

So, without further warning, here are some very strange laws countries (including our own!) have concerning sex:

-In many Middle Eastern countries it is prohibited to eat the sheep you had sex with. A person who decided to eat this sheep is making a deadly sin, and he will never get into paradise with 70 virgins.

-In Lebanon having half of population Christians, men are officially allowed to have sex with animals. Yet, an important restriction is applied: the animal must be female. For sex with male animals death penalty can be imposed.

-In Indonesia a person will be executed if he/she masturbated.

-In Bahrain a man-gynecologist can have patient’s examination only by seeing the genitals’ image in the mirror.

-In Guam, the island in the Pacific owned by the USA, there are specialists called defloration-makers. Such a specialist goes around the island and deprives females of virginity for a certain fee. A virgin cannot get married in Guam. A defloration-maker is the most exotic profession in the world, but this specialist is unlikely to move up the career ladder…

-In Hong Kong a woman cheated by her husband is allowed to kill him, but only with bare hands, use of weapons is not permitted. As for her husband’s mistress, the wife is allowed to kill her by any means.

-In Columbia, in town Kali a woman is allowed to have sex only with her husband. The bride’s mother has the role of an eye-witness and she is required to be next to the spouses during their very first sexual intercourse.

-In Bolivia, in town Santa-Krus a man is not allowed to have sex with a woman simultaneously.

Here in the United States, we have some strange laws as well concerning sex (so we can't go around saying how bizarre the REST of the world is concerning strange sex laws!):

-In Arizona keeping more than two dildos at home is prohibited.

-In Colorado there is a ban on kissing a woman who sleeps.

-In Connecticut, in the town of Hartford, a man is forbidden from kissing his wife on Sunday.

-In Florida only the position “man on top” is legally allowed, and it is not allowed to kiss woman’s bust during sexual intercourse, In Massachusetts a woman is not allowed to have the position of “woman on top” in sex as well.

-In Minnesota sex with birds is strictly prohibited.

-In Ohio women are not allowed to wear lacquered shoes because they underwear can be seen on their “mirror” surface.

So there you have it! And remember, if you find yourself screwing a sheep in the Middle East, please, please, don't eat it afterwards! Do yourself a favor, and offer the sheep a cigarette and some chocolates, and walk away slowly! We don't want to lose any of our faithful Gravyheads!!!

Until next time, this has been a public service report by Dr. Harmless!

"Providing health and beauty to the willy and anus."

2007-03-21T10:02:00.000-04:00

Oh Gravyheads, how could I not share this? After the article, the prophet who foresaw this innovation.

Six

Japan's ever-inventive sex industry's latest innovation is an adaptation of the facial -- a mud pack for the penis, according to Spa! (3/27).

Authorities have in recent years taken a harder line on the flesh trade, prompting operators to come up with up an increasing variety of services aimed at providing pleasure but circumventing the long arm of the law.

The mud pack for the penis, which follows a wine bath for the gonads, is part of an Italian-style esthetic treatment offered by a Tokyo-based service called The Aromani.

"A whole lot of operations similar to ours sprung up in a short time and we needed to provide a service nobody else was offering and this was it," The Aromani's boss tells Spa! "Our sales point is that we also offer variations, including having the service performed by multiple workers (groups of two or three women), or you can have it performed by a shy woman or another who'll do it while talking dirty."

The Aromani's boss says the service began with the motto of "providing health and beauty to the willy and anus."

The service involves using a hotel sink or face-washing basin and filling it with warm water and wine. This is aimed at improving the circulation. Instead of inserting the face, however, the client places their bottom in the bowl, allowing the penis and anus to be soaked in the suds of their sommelier.

Spa! notes that the washing is performed by at least one woman, who The Aromani insists must be in her 20s or 30s at the oldest.

Once the basic basin service has finished, the genitals are swathed in a chunk of mud supposed to cleanse the skin. Once they are completely covered, the woman (or women) providing the service, then show their handiwork, so to speak, until the client reaches climax, or what Spa! calls the "ascent to Heaven." (By Ryann Connell)

Forbes lists ten best Irish Whiskeys

2007-03-18T15:25:00.000-04:00

Whether you consider yourself a beverage connoisseur or just want some help getting your Irish on this St. Patrick's Day, Forbes has compiled a list of their top ten must-drink Irish Whiskeys. Ranging in price from $17 - $1000 per bottle, you can certainly find something on this list that will fit any budget, and perhaps discover something new for your palate as well. Without further ado, Forbes.com's selections:

Bushmills 21 year old (single malt), $115, Bushmills Distillery, County Antrim
Midleton Very Rare (blend), $150, Midleton Distillery, County Cork
Redbreast 12-year-old (pure pot still), $50, Midleton Distillery, County Cork
Green Spot (pure pot still), $60, Midleton Distillery, County Cork
Jameson 18-year-old (blend), $65, Midleton Distillery, County Cork
Knappogue Castle 1951 (pure pot still), $1000, Distillery now defunct, less than one thousand bottles left in the world
Connemara Cask Strength (single malt), $60, Cooley Distillery, County Louth
Jameson 12-year-old (blend), $33, Midleton Distillery, County Cork
Black Bush (blend), $29, Bushmills Distillery, County Antrim
Powers Irish Whiskey, $17, Midleton Distillery, County Cork

Slashfood!

Dial-a-toast from Bushmills Master Distiller

2007-03-18T15:21:00.000-04:00

Happy St. Patrick's Day, everyone! It isn't hard to get into the spirit of this holiday when the festivities are, for a lot of people, centered on the consumption of Irish Whiskey, Irish Cream, Guinness, and the odd green beer. In fact, there is a joke that states a typical seven-course St. Paddy's dinner contains a six-pack and a potato.

All kidding aside, and whether you are Irish or not, it is a great chance to get together with friends or family and raise a glass to toast those around you. If you find yourself at a loss for words though, Colum Egan, the Master Distiller at Bushmills Irish Whiskey, wants to help you with this feat and has set up a toll-free line that features ten of his favorite Irish toasts. To hear the pre-recorded messages (complete with Irish accent) simply dial 1-800-Bushmills. (Note: you may notice that has too many numbers for a regular call. "1-800-Bushmil" worked for me.)

Egan shares his wisdom with such gems as: "May the sound of happy music, and the lilt of Irish laughter, fill your heart with gladness, that stays forever after. May your blessings outnumber the Shamrocks that grow, and may trouble avoid you wherever you go." Cheers!

From slashfood!

BRAIN GRAVY Episode 002: The Shining Face of Something Spectacular

2007-03-10T17:55:00.000-05:00

BRAIN GRAVY Episode 002: The Shining Face of Something Spectacular
I feel a podcast coming on. A podcast so freaking awesome it makes all the other stuff we did look this should be part two of it. Well lucky listener, it IS! This episode finds our hero's doing what they do best: Drink and sit on their collective asses attempting to be entertaining. From the gigabytes of audio collected comes this, the highly anticipated episode two. Pour yourself a beverage of choice and join us on this installment of BRAIN GRAVY!

DOWNLOAD HERE

SUBSCRIBE via iTunes

* We love the warning so much its now in every show!
* The Voice of Reason!
* Mini Pink Floyd!
* The Drunken Doctor!
* Shel laughs backwards!
* Only a couple of us have actually met in real life!
* Pills, booze and Google! The great taste sensation that is sweeping the nation!
* Hear how the Shatner roast gateways us into a whole new realm of something else!
* And much, much more!
* Cheers!

Thanks to:
* Mrs. Spooky
* t3chnomanc3r
* Lilone (pronounced lil-ony)
* Canadian Avenger
* Dean
* Evil
* Rumbaar
* Screaming Viking
* Kinghorse
* Notagirlygirl
* LizzieLizzie
* Josie
* Shel and Bill
* Elijah Craig
* Elle
* SickPuppy
* Eggs - whose audio may or may not have been included in this episode
* The artist formerly known as Mamagoot, AKA Valentine
* Mixmaster secret Tiki music playing sensation Mr. TANGOROA!

Shout outs to:
* Teewinks
* Doctor Tiki, Johnny Johnny, and Lala over at Tiki Bar TV www.tikibartv.com
* Kurt, Eggs and Estry over at The Real Happy Hour www.therealhappyhour.com
* Groucho, CHUD and Angry Barcode over at The Beer Report www.thebeerreport.com
* Rick and Dick over at Big Foamy Head: www.bigfoamyhead.com
* Clarke, Hogdawg and Gonzo over at Dude Night www.dudenight.net
* Jeffery T and the gang at The good beer show: www.thegoodbeershow.com
* Spoon and SickPuppy at Should I Drink That: www.shouldidrinkthat.com
* and anyone else we forgot.

Musical credits:
* "Vortex" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
* "Electric Butterfly" by Falik, from the album Elvolution available from www.magnatune.com

Beware the Vampire Fish!!

2007-02-25T12:10:00.000-05:00

From "Dr. Harmless: Public Service Reporter"

Last night I was part of a conversation that included several GravyHeads, when our good friend Shel told the story of a fish that was feared because it swam into the urethra of male genitalia. She said it was known as the "Vampire Fish". Feeling a sense of duty to my fellow GravyHeads, I decided to investigate this vampire fish, and follow up with a report here to warn you, our loyal public.

What I have uncovered may shock and horrify you. It will certainly prevent you from going skinny dipping in certain parts of our planet (if you had ANY common sense!). Most of all, it will make you think twice before underestimating something that might be on the small side, because even something small can be quite potent!!

The Vampire Fish is officially known as the Candiru or Canero (Vandellia cirrhosa), and is a freshwater fish that is a member of the catfish group. It only grows to a size of 1-2 inches in length and 4-5 millimeters, or a little less than an inch, wide (10 mm=2.5 inches), although it has grown to a size of 6 inches. It is shaped like an eel, and is translucent, making it near impossible to see in the water. It is a fast and powerful swimmer. It is slimy and smooth, with sharp teeth and backward pointing spines on its gill. The Vampire fish is found primarily in the Amazon and Oranoco rivers and is regarded by the most feared fish in the waters by the natives.

The Candiru is considered a parasite, meaning that it is an organism that depends on a different organism to survive, while contributing nothing to the host organism. It typically swims into the gill cavities of other fish, erects the spines along its gill to hold itself into place, feeding on the blood in the gills of the host fish, hence, the name "Vampire Fish of Brazil".

However, the reason it is feared most by Humans is because it is the only vertebrate known to parasitize humans. The fish is supposedly addicted to the smell and taste of human urine, as well as blood in general! If a human is bathing nude in the water and urinates (and tell me you've NEVER done it and I'll call you a liar!!!), the candiru tastes the urine stream and follows it back into the human. There, it will swim into the source orifice, be it vagina or penis, if it is following a urine stream, or the vagina or anus, if it following a blood flow. If it is the urethra it swims into, it will swim deep into the urethra, lodges itself in the urinary tract, erects its spine (yes...it will get erect, too!), and begin to feed on the blood and body tissues in the same way it feeds within the gills of a fish. As it feeds, the body becomes engorged with blood, becoming further lodged within the urethra. The fish continues to feed, eating away at the mucous membrane surfaces, causing bleeding, infection, and eventual hemorrhage and sepsis, which will eventually kill the host. Typically, surgery is the only way to remove the Candiru, with penectomy generally being preferred to the pain, misery, and eventual death if the fish is left in the urethra.

There are some local traditional ways reported to remove the fish, primarily involving the mixing the juice of the green fruit of the Jagua tree (Genipa Americana)and Buitach apple. The first use of the juices is to insert the plants or their extracts into the affected areas. This supposedly will kill and dissolve the fish. The other way is to take the juice of the green fruit of the Jagua tree, brew it into a tea, and, if drunk hot, it will allegedly cause the skeleton of the fish to be dissolved and expelled from the host within a few hours. But more often, infection causes shock and death in the victim before the fish can be removed. I can also imagine irreparable damage to the penis is caused as well....Fortunately, these fish are not found here in the United States, and legislation is being put forward to ban ever importing these fish into the US. One can only imagine the devastation it would cause here in the states, because of the high volume of idiots who do indeed enjoy skinny dipping and urinating in rivers...

So what's the take home message? First, don't skinny dip, unless its in your own pool or hottub. Second, and I stress this point, if you do skinny dip, DO NOT URINATE INTO THE WATER!!!. And if you disregard these two warnings, make sure you have some extract from the green fruit of the Jagua tree handy, otherwise, you might be finding yourself with some serious shortcomings!!!

This has been an investigative report from Dr. Harmless, solving one problem at a time!!!!

Abide...

2007-02-23T16:56:00.000-05:00

I've been thinking.... is there a religion that I could really get behind.. something that I could believe in?
Something that speaks of a greater truth, that i could actually have *gasp* faith in?
Something that encapsolates the universe of mystery we live in, and my own gravyheadedness and how i see things?

And you know, I believe that my prophet may not have died on a cross, may not live in the sky, but in my heart, and in that worn down bowling ally I drive by at night.

Yes, I believe I have found my one true faith, and I'm a better man for it.

From the Chicago Sun-Times

Abide. It means to wait for something, patiently. Or "to endure without yielding, to accept without objection," according to the official word-definers at Merriam-Webster.

Abiding is no easy feat, especially not in a culture that is success-driven, instant-gratification-oriented, and pathologically impatient.

True abiding is a spiritual gift, mastered only, it would seem, by the more fully evolved among us.

Perhaps that's what makes the Dude so dang appealing. Jeff "The Dude" Lebowski is the central character of the 1998 Coen brothers' masterpiece "The Big Lebowski," and apart from spawning a cult following rivaled only by the "Rocky Horror Picture Show" and "This Is Spinal Tap," the Dude is the catalyst for a new religion: Dudeism.

Maybe religion isn't really the correct word. Like-minded followers of the way of the Dude might be more appropriate. Or, as the creator of Dudeism.com puts it, "The Church of the Latter-day Dude," complete with Dudeist priests. (I got ordained as a Dudeist online earlier this week in less than a minute. Now I can preside at Dudeist weddings, which is a nice fallback if this journalism thing doesn't work out.)

"Life is short and complicated and nobody knows what to do about it. So don't do anything about it," the explanation of Dudeist theology -- I suppose you could call it its creed -- says on Dudeism.com. "Just take it easy, man. Stop worrying so much whether you'll make it into the finals. Kick back with some friends and some oat soda and whether you roll strikes or gutters, do your best to be true to yourself and others -- that is to say, abide."

In "The Big Lebowski," the Dude, played by Jeff Bridges, is a bathrobe-wearing, White Russian-drinking, mellow, lie-about, aging hippie philosopher/bowler/toker. He endures physical assaults -- including a swirly in his own toilet and a marmot tossed into the water during an otherwise serene bubble bath -- theft, kidnapping and general disrespect from all quarters.

A pacifist and an idealist

But the Dude, ya see, abides. He doesn't answer violence with violence, or ill will with the same. He is kind and mellow, lazy but not lackadaisical.

Oliver Benjamin, the clever author of Dudeism.com who could not be reached for comment (apparently he lives part of each year in Southeast Asia), claims the Chinese Taoist philosopher Lao Tzu was the original Dude because, in part, he taught the idea of wei wu wei, or "non-doing doing."

That's the Dude in a nutshell.

"The Dude is a very genuine person, and he is always the same person no matter what situation he's in or who he's dealing with," said Will Russell, self-described "co-founding dude" of Lebowski Fest, annual events in Louisville, Ky., and other cities that have been drawing thousands of Lebowski fans since 2002.

"As far as abiding goes, he takes things as they come. He keeps rolling with the punches. They pee on his rug and he goes and gets another rug," Russell said, referring to one of the more unforgettable scenes in the film. "He's just content to go bowling. . . . The Dude defines his own happiness. He endures the world around him and the world around is going at a different pace. He's in the middle, just hanging out."

The Dude is a pacifist.

The Dude is an idealist.

He's also something of an avatar of simplicity for the information age whose abiding appeal is essentially spiritual.

"It strikes me that it has something to do with the kind of ironic appeal of this simultaneously shallow and deep attention to being," said Jeffrey Mahan, professor of media and culture at the Iliff School of Theology in Denver.

"One of the things that the Dude embodies is this possibility that we really could do this, that it's not some unattainable being, someone who is hugely smarter than us, or somebody who has the kind of spiritual presence of the Dalai Lama who could have this attention to being, but that it really is a matter of choice and will. We could choose to do this and don't."

The Stranger comes calling

To that end, on his Web site Benjamin provides a few tips for the would-be faithful in a "Dudeo-Coen" version of what he calls "Duderonomy." There are 38 laws, including:

• • Thou shalt always use fresh creamer when preparing the sacrificial beverage.

• • Respect everyone's point of view. It's just, like, their opinion, man.

• • Never go to a tournament with a negative attitude.

At the end of the film, The Stranger (Sam Elliott), seated at the bar of the bowling alley, offers his condolences to the Dude on the untimely death of his friend and asks how he's doing.

His answer? "Well, ya know, the Dude abides."

Doesn't he, though?

"I don't know about you, but I take comfort in that," the Stranger says. "It's good knowin' he's out there, the Dude, takin' her easy for all us sinners."

I second that emotion.

Mardi Gras Happy Hour: Pat O'Brien's Hurricane

2007-02-21T01:02:00.000-05:00

From Slashfood

Happy Mardi Gras folks! Just about everyone who has been to Mardi Gras in New Orleans has had one of Pat O'Brien's Hurricanes. A tall red drink served in a 24 oz. Hurricane glass which looks like the tall glass chimney of an old fashioned oil hurricane lamp. Sipping a Hurricane is one of the most popular ways to celebrate when in New Orleans, and I've had my share back in the years when I made my annual pilgrimage to Mardi Gras. It's a tasty drink with a bit of a kick, the saving grace is that it is served in a tall glass filled with ice so you can sip it slowly. If you slurp it down fast, then after a few you're gonna feel like you went through a hurricane yourself. Your clothes will start to come off, your popularity will soar, and you'll soon be wearing a lot of Mardi Gras beads and pearls.

Pat O'Brien operated a speakeasy during prohibition called Mr. O'Brien's Club Tipperary. The semi-secret password to get in was "storm's brewin". Then in 1933 after the repeal of prohibition Pat O'Brien moved
across the street and opened Pat O'Brien's and a while later in 1942 moved to the present location at 718 St. Peter Street. The Hurricane was created at Pat O'Brien's some time in the 1940's during the war years. Whiskey was hard to get but rum was plentiful and to order a case of whiskey a bar had to order as many as 50 cases of rum first. So Pat O'Brien created this punch like drink to make use of the available rum.

An interesting bit of Hurricane trivia. Pat O'Brien's restaurant claims to sell more alcohol than any other establishment in the United States. A Pat O'Brien's Hurricane glass hold exactly $10 in US pennies, and is one of the most sought after Mardi Gras and New Orleans souvenirs. I have a few myself, gathering dust in the back of my glass cabinet since the 80's, which I may just have to pull out to make a few Hurricanes for Happy Hour.

If you look around in the mixer section of many stores you can find Pat O'Brien's Hurricane mix in powder and liquid form. To this you just add a decent dark rum. But please, never use the mix unless your in the middle of a hurricane emergency. We implore you to make it from scratch for a much tastier version. Last year Sarah gave you one recipe for the Hurricane. Here's the recipe that the great mixologist and cocktalian, Gary Regan, pieced together from interviews with Pat O'Brien's and other sources and then tweaked for maximum flavor.

Gary Regan's Hurricane

1 1/2 oz. light rum
1 1/2 oz. dark rum
1 oz. fresh orange juice
1 oz. fresh lemon juice (or fresh lime juice)
2 oz. passion fruit juice
1/2 oz. simple syrup
grenadine to taste
1 maraschino cherry, for garnish
1 orange wheel, for garnish

Shake and strain into a ice filled Hurricane glass. Add garnishes and a long straw.

Guinness-flavored Marmite for St Paddy's

2007-02-19T13:10:00.000-05:00

Now this is news Gravyheads can use!

Marmite, a spread made from left over brewer's yeast, has announced a special St Paddy's day version made from Guinness yeast. The goo will be limited to 300,000 jars. Link

Let us all bow to this man's "cork aim"

2007-02-19T12:24:00.000-05:00

While this may not be the drink of choice at GravyLabs, we must bow to this mans effort and skill with his crotch rocket.

Yes, it's a Japanese show, but the video speaks for itself.

WE must all do our part, to save the plant that gave us so much...

2007-02-18T13:55:00.000-05:00

Nation's gin tree in need of a tonic

By David Randall

Published: 18 February 2007

Juniper, the aromatic bush whose berries gave the world gin, is in trouble. It is dying out so relentlessly on British hillsides that a new study says if action is not taken it could disappear altogether. And the root of the problem is, well, sex.

Junipers were once widespread, and provided berries, wood for fires (it burns with a cedar-like fragrance) and prickly branches that gave farmers a natural "barbed wire". But with diminishing demand (most berries for gin now comes from Tuscany and Eastern Europe) and changing land-management patterns junipers have found it harder to regenerate. In England, the numbers of junipers have nearly halved since the early 1970s and, according to a report by Plantlife, a wild plant conservation charity, the decline continues to a dangerous level. One of the authors, Deborah Long, said: "In England there are very few junipers and those that we have are very old."

That would be bad for any species, but juniper has separate male and female plants. And falling populations of ageing plants do not make for a very fruitful love life. At 85 per cent of juniper sites Plantlife found not a single juniper seedling. Which would not matter were juniper a fast-growing plant, but it is not - unlike its well-known relative, the leylandii.

Plantlife hopes its report will spur peopleto regenerate junipers. Juniper is not just attractive, but harbours about 40 species of insects, and is one of only three native conifers. To lose one of them would be distinctly careless of us.

The Ultimate Beer Glass invented!

2007-02-13T22:02:00.000-05:00

The downside?

Sam Adams is a fine brew...
But why dont they put the same amount of effort and create the ultimate beer?

Link to Boston.com article

Which begs the question dear Gravyheads... which would you rather have,

The ultimate beer in a regular glass
or
A decent beer in the ultimate glass?

Remember, sharing is caring, so let us know what you think!

Yiddish Hula Boys

2007-02-11T18:04:00.000-05:00

Fellow Gravyheads,

While this doesn't have a lot to do with... well, anything, it does touch on two ingredients that are near and dear to BrainGravy's hearts, and our roots.
The two things?
Yiddish, and Hula.

Aloha and Shalom, Y'all

Extreme beer opening.

2007-02-06T17:03:00.000-05:00

Dear Gravyheads,

Sometimes we stumble on things that simply must be shared. Even though it's something that we have not covered in the podcast, it just fits into the Gravy way of life.

This is one of those things.
Enjoy, some extreme beer bottle opening.

Theres a longer video as well, if you just cant get enough, here it is...

Coffee stirrer alternatives

2007-02-03T11:31:00.000-05:00

From the files of "The Drunken Dr. Recommends..."

For those of you male listeners of our BrainGravy podcast, and were, for some reasons beyond my comprehension, curious about using a coffee stirrer to, um, stimulate yourself, I feel that, as a doctor, it is my duty to provide you with alternatives to using the stirrer, because, as you know from listening to the podcast, if said stirrer is lost in the urethra, it can lead to some unpleasant, and even "member"-threatening circumstances. Therefore, I would like to present some "alternatives" that might be a tad safer, depending on your point of view (with thanks to a friend of BrainGravy for pointing out this particular website). Let me reiterate that I neither endorse nor condone the following, but feel a moral and medical obligation to point out these alternatives.

Let me begin by saying that if you would prefer to peruse the website yourself, you can click here or here. Mind you, these are just two of an overwhelming number of internet site choices. I am here to focus only on urethral alternatives. The first choice is called the Single Urethral Sound. What is a urethral sound you might ask? Click here to link to the Wikipedia article. Essentially, a sound is the name given to the device used to probe the urethra, and, yes, there are real medical applications for such a device. But, like anything in our society, someone probably one day went to their Urologist, was examined using one of these sounds, thought it felt good, and decided when they went home they would continue the festivities as a self exam. And after telling his friends, well...I suppose the rest is history, as they say.

Now, getting back to the Rosebud Sound, it is given the following description: "Stimulate his urethra and give him memorable sexual pleasure with this Single Rose Bud Sound. These chrome-plated sounds go easily and smoothly into the urethra, thereby stretching it giving him great erotic pleasure. You can then slide them in and out causing great sensations. There are four urethral sounds that graduate in size: small (3 French), medium (5 French), large (7 French) and x-large (9 French)."

Now if you really want to go sound crazy, check out this section of the Medical Toys website. They offer a wide variety of sounds, including the Dittel, the Van Buren and Bakes sound sets. A customer review for the Dittel kit was as follows:

"Recently purchased a set of these sounds. The first set. Not the last. This set says 8-22 FR. Not correct. 18-32 FR are what is included. Trust me, a much better variety. This variety makes it easier for beginners to pick the correct size to start. I found that using the larger ones are easier. They are not as pointy. When negotiating the 'J' curve, a straight sound can tend to poke a little. The larger ones are less pointy and are much more comfortable. They really slide in a lot easier. They are heavy. Hold on to them. I have tried them alone and with a top. I would not advise being alone. It is harder to tell the correct angle that is needed. That can hurt. A top is important. When the sound reaches the prostate, the bottom might get a little squirmy. Feels that good. You know, being tide down would be better. Have fun. Be safe."

Moving on, the next alternative is the Corona Stimulator with Urethral Amplifier. Decorum prevents me posting a picture here (this is a family blogsite afterall). It is decribed as follows: "The Urethral Amplifier, the most important component of this stimulator, is inserted into the urethral cavity. The electro-stim is passed through outward toward the head of the cock. This creates heightened stim inside and out of the cock head, creating enlarged senses of stimulation. The secondary body of this stimulator is adjustable and covers the cock head. It also separates into a third body, the Urethral Amplifier. The primary and secondary bodies connect, and stimulate, at strategic points of the male g-spot (frenulum) and the secondary also stimulate the outer portion of the glans, which makes for complete coverage of the cockhead." Of course, you have to buy a separate electrical device for this little baby. A customer review was as follows:

"This is the single most amazing toy I have in my box! I am working up to fitting my partners cock in my urethral opening! Electro stimulation helps you achieve the most amazing orgasm, if people say you cant cum and piss at the same time, they are wrong. The only problem with this device is that your boss at work may not be too happy if he catches you using it in the work toilet!!!!!" Wow....

Ok...I think we've all had enough for now....keep reading this blog for other alternatives, as well as the answer to the question, "What is prostate milking?"

Until next time, this is Dr. Harmless signing off!

Milk beer?

2007-02-01T23:21:00.000-05:00

From To Be Asian

The innovative minds of the Japanese has created Bilk, which is a type of beer that is made from milk. The idea first came up when dairy firms threw out a huge amount of surplus milk in March last year.

The idea was developed from the son of a manager of a liquor store in Nakashibetsu.

Since milk has a low boiling point, the brewery took care to control the temperature during the boiling process so the milk wouldn't boil over. After they put beer yeast and hops into the drink and began the fermentation process, the beverage looked and smelled like tea with milk. However, when fermentation was complete and the drink cooled down, it had the same color as beer.

Since one-third of the drink is milk, the drink has been viewed as a good way to use up milk in the town. The drink got the thumbs-up from 30-year-old resident Kaori Takahashi, who took part in a tasting session.

"It's got a fruity taste, so it will probably go well with sweets as well," she said.

Each 330 ml bottle costs 380 yen. For the time being sales will be restricted to Nakashibetsu, with six liquor stores selling the drink. (Mainichi )

We won't be able to see or taste 'Bilk' anytime soon as it's only going on sell in Hokkaido, but the future of this innovative drink looks bright!

Do chickens really have vaginas?

2007-01-31T08:00:00.000-05:00

Dr. Harmless answers the tough questions...

After the release of Episode 1 of BrainGravy, the biggest controversy appears to center around whether chickens actually do have vaginas, or, conversely, the fact that many people don't know whether chickens have vaginas. Well, I am here to answer that question once and for all!

The simple answer is: Yes! Chickens do, in fact, have vaginas! The complicated answer is that, although chickens have vaginas, they are not exactly like human vaginas. In fact, if one were to try to find the equivalent in the human female, it would be more like a cloaca, which is a common cavity into which the intestinal, genital, and urinary tracts open in vertebrates such as fish, reptiles, birds, and some primitive mammals. In other words, its like an all-in-one common, primarily exit, vent for the hen. The vagina in the chicken acts as the passage from the uterus to the cloaca. Chicken vaginas also have reservoirs for storing sperm. So while in the real world, in the hen, sperm from roosters are used for reproduction, and, it should be noted that hens do not need roosters to produce eggs; hence, the unfertilized eggs are the ones for human consumption.

Every once in a while, you find the occasional mutant male of the human species that finds the desire to engage in a sexual experience with a chicken . And for those who do engage in such an action, yes, chickens do have a vagina! For those who need further clarification, click on the link, or email me care of this blog!

Look for other answers to the tough questions in the future!

--Dr. Harmless

Brain Gravy!

2007-01-20T14:43:00.000-05:00

Episode 1: Welcome to Brain Gravy AKA: Tales From the Drunken Doctor and Other stuff.

LISTEN TO EPISODE 1

This freshman effort was as much a learning experience as it was fun to make. Taking multiple geographically separated drunk people and capture the essence of the smell of a podcast. This smells like crap? No it smells like Brain Gravy. Be warned. The subject manner is not for the faint of heart as Brain Gravy presents Just Harmless' "Tales From the Drunken Doctor" - multiple times. Included is some spleen venting and a few Jager shots.

Thanks go to: DEAN!, Mrs. Spooky, Canadian Avenger, Number Six, Dew Faith, Josie, Elle Oh Elle, Miss Evil, Keelhauler, Rumbaar, Shel and Bill (big thanks to Bill for voiceover work), Eek!, Screaming Viking, Kaptain Willy, T3chnomanc3r, The CMO, Elijah Craig, Mamagoot, Nurse Betty, TANG, Matt Sigmon

Shout out and thanks to:
Tiki Bar TV
The Real Happy Hour
The makers of Jaegermeister
Baked Pajamas!

Music credits:
Vortex by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Dvorak Polka by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Underway by Matt Sigmon from the phenomenal CD "One Opens Up" available from http://www.matthewsigmon.com/