Saturday, October 31, 2009

Happy Halloween Everybody!

Well here we are the eve of my favorite night of the year. Oh yes, it’s Halloween. Who does not have great stories of Beggar’s Night? Running wild in the streets and grabbing mass amounts of candy from total strangers. Excellent.

How many of us had to take their candy to the local hospital to be x-rayed for razor blades and needles?

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How about that crazy lady who lived in every neighborhood that handed out candy that was covered and cat hair and smelled like cat piss.

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Who can forget such great classics such as throwing eggs at the house whose owner handed out that shit candy? You know the stuff I mean, the ones that looked like Metropolitan ice cream and those marshmallow peanuts. What about that old woman who, despite all the warnings on TV took the time to cook up those home-made goodies that parents wouldn’t let us eat because it may be poisoned?

I remember all that and so much more. “It’s the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown.”, and Christina Smalls dressed like a valley girls tripping in her mother’s heels, giving Seth and I a perfect shot of her underwear. Fuck that was awesome.

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Some day I will tell you all about the time my best friend and his wife came to a Halloween party dressed as Mickey and Mini Mouse. He got so drunk on the “jage” he passed out in the middle of the living room floor with his arms wrapped around a jock-o-lantern filled with jello shots. serial I think you call it.

Tomorrow night my wife and I will be handing out candy and drinking hard apple cider by the firepit. We will be dong our part to make a safe and fun night for the trick-or-treaters.

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It is my honest wish to all of you, have a safe and happy Halloween and look out for one another.

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